It is important to understand that your thoughts can attract things you do not want. Whatever you fear most and think about often or obsessively can also manifest. For example, you may love hiking, but your greatest fear is that someday you’ll encounter a rattlesnake. Repetitive thoughts that are changed with fear can set up that experience unless you let go of it. It is better to banish such dark thoughts. Don’t give up hiking in the desert. instead, be measured, thoughtful, studied, and prudent about undertaking such a hike. Know what precautions to take in order to have a safe hike. Replace your fearful thoughts with a sure-fire belief in a higher power working through you and with you at all times ensuring your safety.
What is self-esteem ?
Self-esteem is the way we feel about ourselves. When we feel good within, our performance goes up and our relationships improve both at home and at work. The world look nicer. Because there is a direct correlation between our feelings and behavior .
A few years ago in a jail: A convict said to the jailer ‘’ I’m going to be released from the prison in a couple of weeks and so happy I am.’’ The jailer said to him ‘’what are you going to do when you leave jail?’’ he told the jailer he is going to try to be a contributing member of society. The jailer asked him the same question again and he gave the same answer. The jailer asked him, ‘’ What are you going to do when you leave jail?’’ Obviously, he was looking for a different answer. At this point, In an angry tone, he said, ‘’I am going to be a contributing member of society.’’ Then the jailer pointed out to him that there was a word of difference in what he said earlier and what he said now. First he had said, ‘’ I am going to try to be’’ and now he said ‘’ I am going to be.’’ The difference is the word ‘’try’’. Either we do something or we don’t. The word ‘’try’’ kept the door open for him to come back to jail.
in reality, having high self-esteem comes from the ability to see yourself confident, special and unique all the time.
Do you see yourself as special and unique? Do you have high self-esteem? Do you have confidence on yourself?
1. Believe in your inner beauty
Don’t say to yourself that you are not beautiful nor unique. You are beautiful and peaceful . There is no one on earth like you and you have a lot to offer to humanity. Looks always to your inner beauty.
2. Believe in your mind power
Know that the way you see yourself comes from the power of your thoughts and mind. Use your mind power and the power of your thoughts to develop love for yourself. Once you begin to see yourself as unique, people around you will begin to see you in the same way.
3. Focus on your positive qualities
You have to realize that you as a human being have good and positive qualities. Always surround yourself with people who think you are beautiful and who enjoy your company and your positive qualities. Focusing on your positive attributes and surrounding yourself with positive friends will help you better accept yourself and hence build your self-esteem.
4. Overcome your negative habits
If you have a negative habit that you don’t like, make plans to get rid of it. Once you substitute your negative habit with a positive one, your self-esteem will improve.
5. Speak up
Many people never speak up because they’re afraid that people will judge them of think of them negatively. The simple fact is that these are fears everyone experiences. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion. You will become a better public speaker. You feel yourself more confident .
6. Practice good posture
By practicing good posture, you will automatically feel more confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You will make a positive impression on others and instantly feel more alert and empowered.
7. Don’t always try to please others
It is great to be considerate of others, but think sacrificing your own needs to please them. You can’t make happy to all . Make sure yourself what is right and wrong and go with it. Don’t allow yourself to be used.
- A good trick to starting to build self-confidence is to pick something about yourself that you do like (EVERYONE has at least one aspect about them that they like) and say to yourself ‘’ I am (aspect) and I am awesome ! ‘’ Then pick something that you want to improve; ‘’ I am going to _____________ and life will rock even more because ____________ !’’ pick a time to repeat this, like every time you brush your teeth or rub your eyes. Examples: ‘’ I am a good artist ! I am going to be less shy and life will rock even more because more people will see my art !’’ ‘’ I am clever ! I am going to think things out more to solve minor problems around me . life is in my control ! ‘’
- Smile at yourself in the mirror every day and at least TRY to smile at others .
Step 2 : Live in the present
What time is it and where are we ? the answer is now and we are here . Let’s make the best of now and utilize the present . The message is not that we didn’t need to plan for the future. If we utilize our present to its fullest, we are sowing the seeds for a better future.
Never leave till tomorrow , which you can do today.
Step 3 : Develop an attitude of gratitude
Count your blessing , not your troubles . When thing seem upside down and you can’t seem to get a clear picture on why you are feeling what you are feeling . stop and take a moment to …
Think about what and who you are grateful for . Count your blessings, name them one by one. Being grateful impacts the way you think and feel . It opens the door for a positive state of alertness, enthusiasm, determination , and energy.
Feeling gratitude energizes the start of your day and brings calmness to the end of the day. Make a list of things that you are grateful for.
Find a stone that feel good in your hand, carry it with you and let it be a reminder to say ‘’ thank you’’ for something in your life each time you touch or see it.
How do you build and maintain a positive attitude?
- Become aware of the principles that build a positive attitude.
- Desire to be positive.
- Maintain the discipline and dedication to practice those principles.
Some steps to attitude change :
If you want to build and maintain a positive attitude, you need to consciously practice the following steps :
Step 1 : change focus, look for the positive
You need to become a seeker of good . you need to focus on the positive in your life. Start looking for what is right in a person or situation. Most of us find fault and looking for what is wrong that we often forget to see the positive picture .
Mr. Andrew came to America from Scotland as a young boy. He started out by doing a job and ended as one of the largest steel manufacturers in united states . At one time , he became a millionaires .
Someone once asked Mr. Andrew how he dealt with people . Andrew replied, ‘’ Dealing with people is a lot like digging for gold . When you go digging for gold you have to move tons of dirt. But when you go to digging, you don’t go looking for the dirt , you go looking for the gold .’’
He replied a very important message. Though sometimes it may not be apparent there is something positive in every person and every situation . We have to dig deep to look for the positive.
What is your focus ? Search for the gold . If you are looking for what is wrong with people or with things , you will find many faults . What are we looking for ? Gold or dirt ? people find what they are looking for .
Some people will always look for the negative :
Negative people will always criticize .
Some people criticize no matter what . It does not matter how well something is done , they will always find fault with it . They will find fault with every person and every situation. They go around finding fault and telling everybody how bad things are and blaming the whole world for their problems. They spread negative massage.
- They are unhappy when they have no troubles .
- Feel bad when they feel good .
- Spend most of their life at complaint counters .
- Always turn out the lights to see how dark it is .
Be an Optimist
How can be an optimist ? ‘’ be strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind . Talk healthy, happiness and prosperity to every person you meet. Make all your friends feel that you appreciate their good qualities and strengths. Look at the sunny side of everything.
Think only of the best, work only for the best, and expect only the best. Give everyone a smile .
I will share the next steps definitely follow this …
Human nature generally resists change. Change is uncomfortable. Regardless of its positive or negative effect, change can often be stressful. Sometimes we get so comfortable with our negativity that even when the change is for the better , we didn’t want to accept it . we stay with the negative.
It is a story about a prisoner who was locked up for many years in a dungeon. After many years , he got his freedom. He was brought out from his cell into the bright daylight of the open world . This man looked all around and after a few moments was so uncomfortable with his newly freedom that he asked to be taken back to block him in his cell. To him, the dungeon, the chains and the darkness were more familiar, secure and comfortable than accepting the change of freedom and an open world.
Many modern – day prisoners do the same thing . The stresses of having to cope in an unfamiliar world are so great that makes them commit another crime in order to be sent back to prison , where though their freedom is restricted .
If your attitude is negative, your life is restricted. Your success at work will be limited. Your enjoyment of life will be less.
Negative attitudes lead to :
A purposeless life
High stress level for themselves and others
Next day I’ll share with you my thoughts on how you can build a positive attitude.
We are all motivated – either positively or negatively
When I was 20 years old, I heard a story of two brothers. One was a drug addict and a drunk who frequently beat up his family . The other was a very successful businessman who was respected in society and had a wonderful family. How could two brothers raised by the same parents, brought up in the same environment, be so different?
The first brother was asked, ‘’ what makes you do what you do ? you are a drug addict, a drunk, and you beat your family. What motivates you ?’’ He anwered, ‘’ My father. My father was a drug addict, a drunk and he beat his family. What do you expect me to be ? that is what I am . ‘’
The second brother was asked, ‘’ how come you are doing everything right ? what is your source of motivation? ‘’ And guess what he said ? ‘’ My father . When I was a little boy , I used to see my dad drunk and doing all the wrong things. I made up my mind that is not what I wanted to be. ‘’
Both brothers derived their motivation from the same source, but one was using it positively and the other negatively. Negative motivation bring the desire to take the easier way which ends up being the tougher way .
People with positive attitudes , are caring , confident, patient, and gentel. They have high expectations of themselves and others .
The benefits of a positive attitude :
There are many advantages to having a positive attitude. Some benefits for you ,
Makes a nice personality .
Increases your enjoyment of life.
Inspires others around you
Start your day with something positive : )
Read or listen to something positive first thing in the morning . After a good night’s sleep we are relaxed and our subconcious mind become open and can receptive. It sets the tone for the day, and puts us in the right fram of mind to make the day to be a positive day . we need to make a consious effort and make positive thoughts . And it will become a habbit.
Please avoid negative movies and television programs :
Today’s kids are learning their attitudes and values more than television and movies more that from any others source. TV programming and advertisements convey the message that drinking is fun , smoking is glamorous etc. What ever we watch can subconsciously influence us. So be aware ….
Winners V/S losers :
- The winner is always part of the solution or answer.
The loser is always part of the problem.
- The winner always has a program .
The loser always has an excuse.
- The winner always face all challenges.
The loser havn’t the guts to face challenges.
- When a winner makes a mistake, he says, ‘’ I was wrong.’’
When a loser makes a mistake, he says, ‘’ It wasn’t my fault.’’
- Winners see possibilities .
Losers see problems.
(now you choose , your motivation with the right attitude)
Action steps :
Look for the positive.
Make a habit of doing it now.
Develop an attitude of gratitude.
Build positive self- esteem.
Stay away from negative influences.
Start your day with something positive.